How Much Money to Give at a Japanese Wedding in 2026

2026-08-29

In short

• A friend or colleague gives ¥30,000. That is the standard, and it barely moves.
• Relatives give more: ¥50,000 to ¥100,000 for siblings, aunts and uncles, ¥30,000 to ¥50,000 for cousins.
• The amount must be an odd number of ten-thousands. ¥30,000, ¥50,000 and ¥100,000 are normal. ¥40,000 and ¥90,000 are avoided outright.
• The money goes in a shūgi-bukuro, a decorated envelope, in new, uncreased notes. A trip to the bank is part of the preparation.

Japan has the most precisely codified wedding-gift system in the world. Where an American guest agonises over whether $150 is enough, a Japanese guest already knows the number, knows why it is that number, and knows which numbers would be an insult. If you are attending a Japanese wedding as a foreigner, this is genuinely learnable in ten minutes, and getting it right is noticed.

The amounts

The bands above follow Kankon Navi’s goshugi guide, published in March 2026 and updated that July. The ¥30,000 friend figure is not new: a Hana-Yume guest survey from 2022 found the same average. If anything, that stability is the point. The convention has held for years while reception costs have risen, which means the envelope covers slightly less of the plate than it used to.

¥30,000 is the single most common figure at any Japanese wedding, and unlike almost everywhere else, it does not drift much with the venue or the city.

If you attend as a married couple, the guidance is 1.5 to 2 times the individual figure, which in practice means ¥50,000 or ¥70,000 rather than ¥60,000 or ¥80,000. The reason is the odd-number rule below.

One workplace rule worth knowing: a subordinate does not out-give their boss. If you are junior and attending your manager’s wedding, ¥30,000 is correct. A manager attending a subordinate’s wedding gives ¥50,000.

Why ¥30,000, exactly?

Because the envelope is itemised, and Japanese guests know the breakdown.

The customary ¥30,000 is understood to consist of the reception meal at roughly ¥10,000 to ¥20,000, the hikidemono, the return gift every guest is sent home with, at about ¥5,000, and a few thousand yen on top as the actual congratulation.

This is the cover-your-plate rule, stated with more precision than any other culture manages. It also explains why the figure resists inflation and why giving less is awkward: below ¥30,000 you are, quite literally and quite visibly, not covering what the couple spent on you.

The number rules, which are not optional

This is the part foreign guests get wrong.

Give an odd number of ten-thousands. ¥30,000, ¥50,000 and ¥100,000 are the standard amounts, with ¥70,000 appearing for couples. The logic is that an odd number cannot be divided evenly, and a sum that cannot be split is a marriage that cannot be split.

Avoid even amounts. ¥40,000, ¥60,000 and ¥80,000 all divide cleanly, which carries the wrong symbolism.

Never give ¥40,000 or ¥90,000. Four is shi, a homophone for death. Nine is ku, a homophone for suffering. These two are not a matter of taste; they are simply not done.

¥20,000 has become a partial exception. Traditionally it was avoided as an even number. It is now increasingly accepted from guests in their twenties, for whom ¥30,000 can be genuinely difficult, and the accepted workaround is to pay it as three notes, one ¥10,000 and two ¥5,000, so that the count of notes is odd even though the sum is not.

The envelope matters as much as the amount

The money goes into a shūgi-bukuro, an ornamental envelope sold in any stationery shop or convenience store. Cash handed over loose, or in a plain envelope, or transferred to a bank account, is not an acceptable substitution.

Two further details are so obvious to a Japanese guest that nobody will think to tell you either of them. The first is that the notes must be new: crisp, unfolded, uncreased. Banks will exchange used notes for fresh ones, and making that trip is an ordinary part of preparing for a wedding, which is precisely why notes pulled from a cash machine on the way are so visibly wrong.

The second is that you write your name on the front, in the space provided, and the amount inside where the envelope indicates. Every envelope is reconciled after the wedding. An anonymous one does not read as modest; it reads as a small administrative problem.

Situations with their own rules

Four situations sit outside the table, and each has a settled answer.

If you are invited only to the after-party, the nijikai, you will find a fixed fee of ¥5,000 to ¥10,000 stated on the invitation. That fee is the gift. You do not bring an envelope on top of it.

If you accepted and then had to cancel, the arithmetic turns on timing, because the couple has already paid for your meal. Cancelling close to the date means sending about half of what you would have given, so ¥15,000 to ¥20,000 for a friend. More than a week out, a third is accepted without comment.

If you were not invited at all but want to mark the occasion, send a present rather than cash, or ¥5,000 to ¥10,000 by registered mail.

And if you are family, stop reading national averages. Households routinely agree a single figure among themselves in advance, and the only reliable way to find it is to ask a relative.

If the wedding is in Japan but the couple is not Japanese

An international couple marrying in Japan is usually running their own culture’s wedding, with a registry, a honeymoon fund or nothing at all. The goshugi system does not apply, the odd-number rules do not apply, and your travel costs count as part of what you are giving. That case is worked through in do you still fill the envelope after paying to get there.

Frequently asked questions

How much goshugi do you give at a Japanese wedding?

¥30,000 if you are a friend or colleague. ¥50,000 to ¥100,000 for close relatives, ¥30,000 to ¥50,000 for cousins, and ¥100,000 or more from parents.

Why must the amount be an odd number?

Because an odd number of ten-thousand-yen notes cannot be divided in two, and a sum that cannot be split symbolises a marriage that cannot be split. Even amounts carry the opposite meaning.

Is ¥20,000 acceptable at a Japanese wedding?

Increasingly, yes, particularly from younger guests. Pay it as one ¥10,000 note and two ¥5,000 notes so the number of notes is odd, which satisfies the convention.

Why can you never give ¥40,000 or ¥90,000?

Four is pronounced shi, which is also the word for death, and nine is ku, which is also the word for suffering. Both are avoided at weddings without exception.

Do the banknotes really have to be new?

Yes. New, uncreased notes signal that the gift was prepared in advance rather than assembled on the day. Banks will exchange used notes, and Japanese guests do this routinely.

What if I only go to the after-party?

The nijikai charges a set fee, usually ¥5,000 to ¥10,000, which takes the place of goshugi. You do not give both.

Can I send a bank transfer instead?

No. The envelope is the gift’s physical form and it is handed over at the reception desk. If you cannot attend, send cash by registered mail rather than transferring it. The wider rules on moving gift money across borders are in envelope or bank transfer.